Can’t Write Right!

But I do it anyway!  I have aphasia.  I had a stroke.  It pains me.  I get dizzy.  I needed to fix my gaze as though I was car sick.  It’s just so frustrating.

The books say it….

affects comprehension and production of words, sentences, and/or discourse. It is typically characterized by errors in word retrieval or selection

  • Here’s an example: the mind changes my written word  “horse” into ‘cow”.  My fingers keep typing “horse”, “horse”. “horse”.  But my eyes see “cow”, “cow”, “cow”.

Over the dozen op so years since my stroke, I’ve learned to compensate.  A little bit.  My spelling is atrocious.  I live or die with my spell checker.  I know lots of words.  I just can’t produce them.

  • Another example:  phonemic paraphasias.  I couldn’t say that if the Mujaheddin terrorists demanded it on my life.  P.P, as I’ll call it, is substituting sounds in the word.  Like calling a “horse” a force or porse or norse.  As you can imagine, such transpositions an be hilarious.  Or mortally embarrassing.  Thankfully, I have a wicked sense of humor that allows me to dance away from most situations.
  • Circumlocutions are saying “horse”, but all you can say is, “What’s the word for that animal that you ride with a saddle”.  Right.  But no cigar!
  • Then there are neologisms:  sounds that are NOT words, but a confusion of words and spelling errors and ‘sound-a-likes’ that get the job done [mostly] but are technically inaccurate.

This is my typology.  Its not NEW, but its newly conceptualized.  They’re calling it “jargon aphasia“.

—–     —–     —–

You’ll see me referencing this post again and again.  Sometimes I  just get into a loop where I can’t find words, or spell them, or think them, or physically produce the muscle/nerve connections for them.

Still, I write.  Because I love people and the only way to communicate with them with words.

Aphasia Brochure

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7 thoughts on “Can’t Write Right!

  1. For those of you who don’t know Taxi D in person, he actually speaks nearly without aphasic intrusions at all. But this is from many years ago when, in order to hear something profound, stupid or hilariously funny, one had to be quiet and patient. Now He’s respectively profound, stupid or hilariously funny fluidly.

    This is to say, he has recovered much from years ago. For example, he can now walk. This is, to my mind, a miracle. He has recovered these functions entirely without exercise, physical or mental. I say this not to “out” him, but to offer encouragement to others.

    Taxi D, maybe we could get a piece from you on neuro-plasticity?

    He is my best friend. We know each others deepest and darkest. I wish for you all to have such a person at your back.

  2. Thanks for this clear description of these conditions. My mother has been having TIAs – just enough to frustrate her when she tries to tell me what she’s looking for and it becomes “that thing that does oh you know”. The last poem I posted on my blog (http://catterel.wordpress.com/2012/04/12/over-and-out/) was prompted by this difficulty in communication – as well as being a metaphor for the general inability of people to understand one another.

  3. Dear Taxi Dog,

    My apologies for making contact via your comments box; I couldn’t find an email address for you.

    I am a Speech and Language Therapist doing a Masters project at City University London. I am contacting you because we wish to analyse your blog in our theses. The name of the project is Blog talk: the impact of aphasia on people’s lives.

    Please have a look at the information on this link:

    http://blogs.city.ac.uk/blogtalk/information-sheet-2/

    Please contact us to let us know if you want to take part, or don’t want to, on abbw446@city.ac.uk

    Many thanks,

    Victoria Bedford

  4. Dear Taxi Dog, I’m so happy that you found my blog as it led me to yours, which is so inspiring. Thank you for being so inspiring. Twonafish sums it up: ‘respectively profound, stupid or hilariously funny fluidly…’ Please keep writing. Warmly, Esther

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