Of Course I Can Dance!

I’ve told you about my “wheelchair dancing” in another post.  But now I’m really dancing.

I’ve been WANTING to stand up.  Just recently, just WANTING to.  “Wanting” doesn’t explain the feeling.  I have the feeling that I can. Something is going on in my muscles!   Co-ordination!  [before, all all I could do was  “twitches”]

The only “walking” I do is into my doctor’s office.  The building is a in an old historic building downtown and somehow it meets the building codes.  But the doorways are too small for my wheelchair.  So I have put a four pronged cane in her office that I only use to take the 8 steps in.  With the doctor guiding each step.

This “walking” 8 steps is all the walking I’ve done in almost a decade.  I don’t know how or why…I just FELT I could more! The other day, I tried.  Tried.  [Any shrink will tell you that “trying” and “doing” are two species of action.]  But I did!

Please understand!  I  didn’t  do  any thing.  Several days I said to myself, “Let’s try again”.  Two days ago, walked from the kitchen to the bathroom.  Maybe little baby steps.  Thirty steps.  Yesterday, I’m walking all over he apartment.

Now I will tell you that I’ve had several serious falls.  I fell down on my back, broke my paralyzed arm under myself, and had fractures in seven places along my forearm.  Owie!  So maybe I was foolish for trying.  Several doctors told me that because of my use of coudmadin, my arm just will not heal.  And that I should be content in my safety.  But I FEEL more stable every day.

I’m not going to prance down the street, although in Hollywood prancing is de rigueur.  I’ll only do it in the house, a` la maison, as it were.

More and more, I believe that there is a GUIDING PRINCIPLE.  “God” works.  The brain’s capacity to heal itself works too. The Big Bang?  The 2000 Year Old Man?  The Six Million DOLLAR Man?  I don’t know?

For me, only for me, I thank the Deity; who encourages to to be my crazy, humorous, spiritual, intellectual, over-sexed, hungry-for-sensation; kindly, poetic, clumsy, obsessed, stroke-survived, still striving self.

Long may s/he wave!

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